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• Beverly Hills Mole

  

  by Shane Ormond
  On Feb 26, 2020

  A luxury hotel chain accused Hilton’s Waldorf Beverly Hills of engaging in corporate espionage in a lawsuit filed in Los Angeles yesterday. (“Towels shaped like swans, eh? Wait until the guys at corporate hear this.”)

  An article in Investing

• One of the Worst Days on Record

  

  by Shane Ormond
  On Feb 25, 2020

  An article in Investing

• 

  Murder Your Thirst

  

  by Shane Ormond
  On Feb 21, 2020

  A company selling water in overpriced cans adorned with heavy metal imagery has raised $9 million in Series A funding, proving that business in this century is just an exercise in repackaging the same old crapola.

  An article in Investing

• The Tankening

  

  by Shane Ormond
  On Feb 20, 2020

  Shares of Groupon and Blue Apron tanked yesterday after their quarterly reports reignited skepticism about the companies’ “unconventional” business models. (And by “unconventional” I mean “doesn’t work.”)
  Blue apron, groupon, e-trade, morgan Stanley
  Blue apron, groupon

  An article in Investing

• 

  Chocolate-Covered Ants

  

  by Shane Ormond
  On Feb 18, 2020

  An article in Investing

• Valentine’s Day Kind of Sucks Actually

  

  by Shane Ormond
  On Feb 13, 2020

  Tesla’s shares slid this morning after the EV company announced plans for a $2 billion common stock offering (just two weeks after Elon Musk said they definitely wouldn’t be doing that sort of thing).

  An article in Investing

• 

  Valentine’s Day Kind of Sucks Actually

  

  by Shane Ormond
  On Feb 12, 2020

  Health measures taken to slow the spread of the coronavirus have trapped thousands of cruise ship passengers in a terrible limbo of magic shows and towels folded in the shape of a swan.

  An article in Investing

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  The Miracle on Brioche

  

  by Shane Ormond
  On Feb 11, 2020

  Sales at Popeyes restaurants surged 43% in the final three months of 2019 thanks to someone’s genius idea to put fried chicken between two pieces of bread.

  An article in Investing

• 

  3D-Printed Hotels for Millennials

  

  by Shane Ormond
  On Feb 10, 2020

  The co-founder of Uber and guy who gets into drunken arguments in ubers, Travis Kalanick, is among a group of investors funding a company building 3D printed hotels for millennials.

  An article in Investing

• 

  In Space, No One Can Hear You IPO

  

  by Shane Ormond
  On Feb 7, 2020

  The father of Grimes’s unborn child is planning to take SpaceX’s budding space-internet operation public, giving hungry investors another opportunity to invest in a stock that will sink every time Elon Musk goes on a podcast.

  An article in Investing