A family-owned company in Britain is operating a global network of businesses hiding money for fraudsters, criminals, and ultra-rich assholes, according to a massive treasure trove of data leaked to media.
Santa faces an unprecedented challenge this holiday season, with more deliveries than ever before combined with a significantly shorter delivery window (also he just started Keto and his energy levels are all over the place).
Fitbit (FIT) shares surged this morning after an SEC filing revealed a bidding war between Google and a mystery firm trying to buy the wearable tech company (including the revolutionary step-counting tech it was giving away for free in boxes of cereal 20 years ago).
A worker for the UK Consulate says Chinese Secret Police abducted and tortured him in an effort to prove that Britain was the mastermind behind the Hong Kong protests all along. (An incredible feat for a country that can’t even mastermind its way out of the EU.)